Dream on

Supposedly, we all have (or should have) a dream…to achieve something phenomenal. The ‘phenomenal’, however, is subject to interpretations….and hopes. For me it may be taking up cooking as my profession, for you…being an astronaut or something even fancier.


I have always been the content types amongst people around me…or atleast I think so. I don’t have any dreams. I don’t dream of being rich, of owning a house, let alone a bunglow, I don’t want a car…..I am NOT ambitious…and quite often than not, the ones who are, look down upon me….Why?...I have always failed to understand this…is it really important to sound ‘BIG’?


I have a few (small) desires, if not dreams….desires, which only I know about (for I am the desire, says my name)… probably not ‘fancy’ enough if gauged by the yardstick of ‘the ambitious elite’.

I have always wanted to live a subtle life…I live so…and thus I would like to remain excluded.

fortune...

When I complain about not having money, I remind myself of a family, that some 20 years back had no money for Diwali Pooja and could offer only cookies. Yet, they never complained and moved on.


When I complain of hopelessness, I remind myself of a woman, who underwent severe depression. She decided to emerge strong for her three little kids, (...and she did) eventually running her family. She is now a tower of strength to her children…and her husband.


When I complain about a burdensome life, I remind myself of the blessings bestowed upon on a child, who was supposed to be born dead. The child survived; the third child and a female, the most unwanted combination. Met with an accident when she all of 6 months. Had it not been for her parents, who would run every month from Patna to Chandigarh for her treatment for 5 long years, her existence would have been dependent and burdensome!


When I complain of loneliness, my heart reminds me of a man who has shown how wonderful can love be…


I have lots to complain about but a lot more to appreciate…

"Royalty, keep off!"

The ‘raw’ draws my interest...a great deal...and I somewhat resent the ‘proper’ world around me. Sophistication over burdens my heart with discomfort and breathlessness...it exudes complications. How does the world manage to remain so much in shape...all the time!!!?? However, there is no escape. I can’t close my eyes to that.... I can’t stop breathing. It’s an inevitable aspect of the world I am living in.
I thank myself that my heart is still drawn to the natural... and to some extent to the old (well, slightly, I would say). For instance, a dupatta draped around carelessly scores above the one lined up consciously and neatly, a blunt pencil has life filled in it... smokey eyes enchant me... unkempt hair, coffee in an old mug, a white page turned-yellow so on and so forth...I recently went to a shop...a big brand it was...it had clothes placed on rusted iron racks...I was delighted to see such a raw display of the 'fine’...

...in d hope of sustainability!

Another day at work... Reading through reports. An attempt to prepare another one. Mind grappling with appalling health status of women and children. Fingers on the keyboard. Views, reviews et cetera et cetera. Suddenly a song fell on my ears. I wonder how a colleague of mine works with his head phones on. I do not like distractions. But this one happened for the good...or so I guess... it reminded me of the actor whose blog I would follow religiously till some time back... ‘the Aamir Khan’....reminisced about a few of his write-ups... An idea popped up in my mind- why not create my own. In a few minutes I was sorted. I know it’s a no-rocket-science-job but for people like me who are averse of writing electronically and would prefer to pick up a paper and pen (or a pencil) it may well be!! My friend sitting on her work station noticed a slight grin on my face. The figures of maternal mortality and stunted children could make no one smile, so she had to ask for the reason. I showed it to her and got an instant question “Why fuji?” to which I replied” Just like that”. I was more interested in showing to her the design and stuff...and got a few suggestions.
Actually it wasn’t the just-like-that factor behind it. Everything is backed by some reason. Fuji, Mt Fuji is symbolic of heights, stand alone spirit, high life condition, hugeness...all in all a source of encouragement to me, next only to my best friend.
A point of advice from her before she signed off to her desk “it may be addictive”...left me wondering if at all it can be when this form of writing is a pain to my eyes, head and fingers.... now having written my first piece...I think...it can be...